by Charlotte Amelia Poe (preferred name: Poe)
you don’t have to believe me –
i know i have a lousy track record
like that time i said i wasn’t going to die
and then i did
but this time i mean it baby
i’m going to watch the world burn as i hold your hand
fucking fireworks on the fourth of july and all of that
your pinky wrapped around mine and the smoke still in your lungs from the last good cigarette
the sky lighting up like a thousand goddamn demons
neon reflected in your eyes all pinks and blues
prettiest goddamn boy i ever saw
never did know whether to mark or kiss you
like, i wanted to bruise you up so good
but –
we were kids then
world ends and suddenly you gotta grow up fast
watched you grow up all scarred and beautiful
like a map of what was left of our little town
look at me and say “think this might actually be it”
i don’t say anything, because what’s left, really?
hold you a little tighter with the smallest part of myself
you look down at our hands
“jesus” you say and it’s never sounded more like blasphemy
you reel me in and in and in until we’re barely two people anymore
and i guess i did lie after all
i don’t get to watch the world burn –
cos all i’m looking at is you
before i close my eyes and the neon gets real bright
searing phosphorus into my skull
your mouth on mine a different kind of searing
i don’t feel the world end
only you.
About the Author
Charlotte Amelia Poe (they/them) is an autistic nonbinary author from England. Their first book, How To Be Autistic, was published in 2019. Their debut novel, The Language Of Dead Flowers, was published in September 2022. Their second novel, Ghost Towns, was self-published in 2023.
Nebulous 